The Healing Power of Heart(break)
Why companies should give it more attention
I was born with a little hole in my heart, and my heart (including love and love for personal growth, expanding my heart in all ways) has always played a central role in my life. It’s what led me to leave the corporate world to start a healing practice and what brought me to Ibiza. And no, this won’t be a personal blog about all those experiences, nor about the heartbreaks I’ve lived through - and, to be honest, more often caused by myself. Rather, this is a reflection on how much space we allow the heart to take up. Especially within (bigger) organizations.
What I notice is that we don’t just overprotect our hearts in our private lives, I see the same thing in business: holding back and not fully showing ourselves. We hold parts of ourselves back, afraid of not being professional enough. For example, we have a good idea but choose not to voice it, fearing it (or perhaps we ourselves) might be rejected.
The heart is still too often associated with being ‘too soft’, or not tangible enough. Something that needs to be protected, not taken too seriously, instead of something that deserves to flourish fully.
What a waste.
Truly, what a waste. Because leaving little room for the heart also leaves our courage unused. Courage in the true sense of the word (from the Old French ‘corage’, meaning heart, inner strength). People who are connected to their hearts tend to come up with the most original solutions. They are more connected to their creativity and more willing to make bold decisions. In my experience, when the heart is allowed to fully speak and live, a kind of limitless courage rises to the surface.
Many successful business leaders actually start from the heart, whether they realize it or not. There isn’t always a fully thought-out plan driven by the mind at first, there’s often a feeling instead: This is it. I just feel it. I follow my heart.
Take for example Steve Jobs (founder of Apple), who spoke openly about letting himself lead by the heart by saying: ‘Have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become.’ Another example: Yvon Chouinard (founder of the successful outdoor brand Patagonia), he took from a business perspective illogical decisions like stimulating clients to buy less. This ultimately led to loyal commitment and long-term success.
In many ancient cultures like Egypt, there was at that time no sharp divide between head and heart; the heart thought, decided, and knew. Over time, the mind became increasingly dominant. With Descartes’ famous quote ‘Cogito, ergo sum’, thinking almost became the foundation of existence, emphasizing the importance of the head over the heart.
What should be a beautiful collaboration has turned into an ‘either/or’. You’re either a ‘head person’ or a ‘heart person’. For a long time I recognized this either/or distinction in myself as well. When I worked as a lawyer, I operated almost entirely from my head. Later, when facilitating healings, I worked mainly from the heart. It was either one or the other. Today, I’ve learned to use both, and that’s what makes my sessions warm and compassionate, yet also sharp and pragmatic.
Time and again, I see clients regain their compass and clarity when they reconnect with their hearts. The mind is still present, but steps back just enough to allow processes to unfold, before it fully returns to integrate everything in a grounded, rational way.
However, in our society (and most commercial organizations), the head has claimed more territory, and the heart has retreated inward. Letting the heart speak freely in a healing session may be easier; people who sign up for this kind of work are often already familiar with the heart’s power and wisdom. But it’s not strange that we don’t easily show our hearts everywhere, especially not in larger organizations. The heart is vulnerable, both literally and figuratively.
You may recognize that some of the deepest emotional pain you’ve experienced was because of a broken heart. Physically, there’s a reason it’s protected by a rib cage. At the same time, the heart (physically and symbolically) is an incredibly powerful mechanism, and more than that. Just look at the processes in your body that it initiates and sustains. And speaking for myself, the periods after the end of a relationship have taught me the most about who I am. When the heart breaks, after grief and sadness, a surplus of strength emerges.
So how can there be more space in companies for the vulnerable heart, or rather, for the power of the heart? How can we better harness its value?
I don’t have a definitive answer yet. But if you follow me through this reflection, a first step might be to acknowledge and re-acknowledge that while we have magnificent brains, we also have immensely powerful hearts. Hearts that, when they feel safe and valued, can create things the mind alone can only dream of. A moral compass for exploring uncharted territory, places the mind hasn’t yet reached. A space where wisdom is drawn from something larger, where the heart leads and the mind follows.
Not either/or - but a collaboration between two essential forces of life.
Let’s make more space for the new Steve Jobs or Yvon Chouinard ;)
Let’s work with our brains and from the heart.
